Will I ever be able to draw, game, do whatever with my hands again? I’m at a loss..

I don’t know what I’m going to do with this disease. It feels like it’s taking everything from me. I don’t want to just have this disease take any form of life. What life is there when all you can do is just watch? They say this disease is not a death sentence but one of my biggest fears was losing my hands mobility.

I try to remain hopeful. I did mri scans on my wrists not too long ago and it seemed there was no indication of inflammation or synovitis. I can only hope thats a good indication that I can still be able to do the things I love before the damage occurs. I’ve been dealing with this for almost 20 years.

I love to draw, animate, and game. I’m just a male who loves entertainment. I don’t want to be like a ALS patient in the future. I never thought of this disease being as bad as that but sometimes I think and scare myself of that my issues being so complex I’ll lose my hands.

Please tell me that this is all treatable. I need some hope in my life. I can’t get in MTX because my rheumatologist screwed me over and denied me of PSA in hands. I already have spine issues already. I’m hoping extensive physical therapy can help with the pain.

Please, anyone here, male or female, tell me that I’ll regain my function. I’ve heard horror stories of some having to quit what they loved doing. I never cared for sports so not being able to do sports felt nothing to me. But this? This is maddening! This is nightmarish.

I’m tried voltaren cream but it makes my hands cold. I really don’t have much options atm. I’m severely depressed that this may limit me doing anything. This can’t be like this. It just can’t. Help!