How Can I Help My Family Understand?
My family keeps suggesting I walk and exercise and that I don’t do enough. I’ve also been told I have Fybro and cfs.
How do I start to make them understand this is a disease and not something that can be fixed?
Have a question about living with PsA? Submit yours here!
I really wish I had an “easy” fix for you @LisaB69. I’m so sorry that you feel like your family just doesn’t understand the true nature of the illnesses you live with every single day. I’m sure you know that finding the right balance between rest and movement is tricky at best and it is so hard to feel loved and supported when family doesn’t seem to understand at all.
In my experience, the first thing is for family to be willing to listen and learn. Sometimes, those we love think they know better or they watch the commercials on tv that promise we can have our lives back if we just take their medications, but we both know that isn’t exactly the reality. But if you have family that is willing to LEARN about PsA, Fibro, and CFS, then that is the most important step.
Perhaps from there, you can ask them to accompany you to a doctor’s appointment so they can really understand the seriousness of the situation and learn that there is no fix.
In addition to that, I know my husband has found it very helpful to read the articles that myself and others share here. Find some of your favorites, those that resonate most with you, and share them.
Either way, I really hope that if you don’t feel like you have the support and understanding that you need from your family, that you have it somewhere. Feeling like someone “gets” it is so important to your mental and emotional health and quite frankly it can make such a difference, especially on the difficult days. We are here for you and if there is any other way I can help, I’d be happy to. We are happy that you are here! -Leanne, Community Moderator
I have the exact problem with my family. They think I'm either exaggerating about my pain or just seeking attention. I have no idea how to make them understand. I've asked my mom to read up on my condition and her response is that you can't believe everything you read online.
Hello
, I can hear how frustrating this is for you. Unfortunately, it's not uncommon for family members to not understand what people with psoriatic arthritis are going through. You are not alone! I am wondering if this article would help, please feel free to share with your mom. Wishing you all the best.
Jill, Community Moderator
https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/living/5-things-i-wish-my-family-knew/Thank you Jill. I've tried to get my mom to read things about my conditions and she usually tells me I read to much about them. I feel very alone most days because I can't help them understand. My entire life centers around my mom, my daughter and granddaughter. Right now I'm taking care of my mom who is recovering from surgery for a torn rotator cuff. No matter how much pain I'm in I jump up or drop what I'm doing to help her. I also have my granddaughter every day now that school is out. I'm not complaining I love them all so much I just wish just once they would try to understand my pain is totally different from anything they feel. Thanks for the article and kind words.
I use to be a jock and this PSA has destroyed my health but my husband and family think I can just pull up my big girl pants and become a jock again.... I can’t even stand up from a sitting position and now I can’t even open a jelly jar... agh!
Hi
. I can definitely understand your frustration. I was a very active person too not so much a jock but still very active. It is so hard to make family understand. If you are not aware of it you might try using the Spoon Theory to explain it to them. Hope this helps. Vickie W., Community Moderator
