Sober Socializing

By ClairG

3 min read

Alcohol has always been a trigger for my psoriatic arthritis along with my psoriasis. Social drinking is quite a culture where I live, so oftentimes, a social dinner or visit to the pub has alcohol involved.

This can vary in capacity and as a nation, we are known for overindulging. Not something to be proud of, it just is what it is.

I also recognize that this is true for many places and countries in the world. Social drinking is a massive part of social culture.

Social and health management in psoriatic arthritis and psoriasis

For many people stepping out of this habit of drinking alcohol is hugely beneficial to the management of both psoriatic arthritis and psoriasis. This can however often lead to one not attending social occasions as being sober is not fun when everyone is drinking. It can be hard to connect to friends that are drinking when you are sober.

Connecting or disconnecting

With psoriatic arthritis, I often feel isolated and lonely as is and for many years I kept drinking to keep up with my social life and soon realized it was not worth my health. This did however leave me often alone at home, so over time this left me looking for ways to change how I socialize while out.

Adjust how you connect with friends who are drinking, arrange breakfast or lunch dates with friends that you would usually hang out in bars, etc. These are less likely to involve alcohol and sitting and having coffee at lunch or breakfast is easier than at a bar at night.

Chatting with friends

I chatted to some of my friends who would jokingly always offer me a drink. They would pressure me with kindness and jest to try and get me to join in the jovial shooters etc.

Over coffee one morning we had a chat and I explained that I would love to keep hanging out with them. Just that alcohol was an absolute no.

This adjustment was hard enough for me as it is and I needed them to support me when out as well. Most of them were understanding and apologized for not understanding how badly the alcohol affected my health.

There are always those who think it's nonsense or have their own opinion. I made peace with this.

Sober partying

I learned to go out sober and lose the need to fit in, There are so many alternatives to alcohol and we know that one does not need alcohol to have a good time. And it is quite simple once a person has worked your way around the old habits and made changes.

Going out I now often drink a mocktail or some sparkling water and lime and something of the sort. Go out early and learn to have fun sober, I dance and sing and have as much fun as everyone else. I am often available to help my friend get home safely too.

I never wake up with my joints totally stiff and my skin ruined from the night before. A big bonus is also no more hangovers. Sure I still wake up with sore and stuff joints, but not like I did after a weekend of drinking.

Having self-confidence while not drinking

The strangest and most welcome side effect of this, is the ability to confidently be myself. Learning to dance and sing sober, without the assistance of alcohol was so wonderful.

This has translated into my daily life as well, strangely enough, I have become more confident and at ease with who it is that I am. Alcohol has been known to drop my inhibitions and make me feel so free and without judgment. So now I am learning to do this all the time and sober.

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Eric_the_Eric Member
<inline-mention username="ClairG" user-id="3280001"/> Good to see someone else blowing this horn. Anyone with any kind of health challenges should avoid alcohol consumption at all costs. Ideally, people should stop consuming alcohol altogether, but unfortunately, it has such a long history of being a wonderful social lubricant (at least until people in social situations have consumed too much, in which case it has the opposite effect). From the World Health Organization website: It is the alcohol that causes harm, not the beverage. "Alcohol is a toxic, psychoactive, and dependence-producing substance and has been classified as a Group 1 carcinogen by the International Agency for Research on Cancer decades ago – this is the highest risk group, which also includes asbestos, radiation and tobacco. Alcohol causes at least seven types of cancer, including the most common cancer types, such as bowel cancer and female breast cancer. Ethanol (alcohol) causes cancer through biological mechanisms as the compound breaks down in the body, which means that any beverage containing alcohol, regardless of its price and quality, poses a risk of developing cancer." Alcohol is toxic to healthy adults. For those of us facing the challenge of autoimmune diseases, its toxic effects are far and away greater than on the average healthy adult. When I stopped alcohol, my most profound fear was, "Who will I hang out with? Where can I go, and what can I do?" At first, I looked up on abstaining from alcohol as just that, abstinence. But gradually, I was able to change my attitude on this, and view it not as a deprivation of something I enjoyed, but as embarking on a new way of life that included healthier choices. I didn't have to end friendships, but I did develop new, and quite honestly, healthier friendships as a result. I found many new and interesting activities that didn't require alcohol to be fun. And, I am much healthier as a result. 
1. ClairG Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="Eric_the_Eric" user-id="6704533"/> Thank you so much for your feedback here, I do like hearing from you. Staying sober is such an important thing for me, and you are so right when you say that it is only a social lubricant till you have had too much, and then pivots and changes things for the worse. I am so glad that you have developed healthier and happier friendships. It is vital for us, in my opinion. Staying away from alcohol when battling anything health-related, and this includes mental health in my books. -Clair (Team Member)