Revoking My License to Complain

My blood type is B- Rh-, or as my husband calls it “BE negative”. It’s not that I am generally a downer to be around, because I am typically upbeat and positively happy. However, it is my ability to see all that could go wrong in a situation that makes that possible. Unfortunately, that means pointing out all the negative aspects of everything. This alone isn’t too bad as long as I am careful to keep my negative thoughts constructive and not just an excuse to allow myself to complain.

Coping on dark days

Ever since chronic pain from psoriatic arthritis and my other chronic illnesses began interfering with my life (long before any diagnosis), I complained about them. I complained about how much pain I was in, how no one understood, how my life had changed, and how much I missed my old life. The problem with that complaining was that it was nothing but complaining. I didn’t want to hear anyone’s suggestions for improving my life or even consider that there was something that could be done to relieve my pain. If my doctors couldn’t fix me, then how could anyone else? And yes, I complained about them too! The only person or thing I didn’t blame or complain about was myself.

Wake up call

It was when my doctors began refusing to treat my chronic pain with opioids that I became desperate for relief. So desperate that I began trying natural and alternative treatments that I hadn’t been open to before. It was after experiencing my first bit of relief that I realized that I should have been complaining about my own stubbornness of not taking ownership over my health or trying different things.

A positive state of mind

While transforming my pain management and treatment plan, I also discovered how my attitude impacted my health. When focused on the doom and gloom of every situation, I felt heaviness in my heart. The darkness also blinded my eyes of the beauty that was right in front of me. Instead of being thankful that I could drive myself to the grocery store, I complained about the traffic. If there is one thing I have learned about living in southern California for the past 8 years, it is that there is always traffic and it is NOT worth getting upset about.

Revoking my license to complain doesn’t mean that I never complain, I still do but when I do I do it constructively. If I find myself complaining about running late due to traffic, I come up with suggestions to help avoid the same thing from happening in the future. For example, I can’t control the traffic, but I can leave earlier or take a different route.

Licensed to have fun

My husband and children weren’t the only people who were tired of my negativity and complaining, I was too. I seriously couldn’t stand listening to myself. Not allowing negative thoughts reign over my brain has opened up a world of fun and has taught me to get creative in finding ways to improve my health and life.