Can't Stand the Pain

By breeszanto

1 min read

Hi its taken 7 years to find the rite doctor to help me find out I have psoratic arthritis.
I have only been diagnosed with this a few months ago an have been prescribed methotrexate think thats how u say it. I've been really frightened to take it because of all of the side effects but I've built up courage to go an have it as of next week after easter break. I can't stand the pain no more and the crazy arse fatigue is crazy. My husband thinks I'm just lazy and really doesn't understand how I feel an what pain I'm going through. It's pulling us apart talking about dnt help dnt think it sinks in. I am now 35 and the last 10 yrs of my life have been hell and being young you are brushed of more then you are listened to.

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Casey Moderator
Hi breeszanto! I am so sincerely sorry to hear about all you have been going through. Not only with the pain, but with dealing with judgments from those around you, and fighting very relevant and understandable fears when it comes to new treatments. Please know you're not alone in many of these feelings and experiences, and we're here for you. I thought you might be interested in a few articles I found, that related to different parts of your story. First, your experience with a long wait time until accurate diagnosis is very common. PsA can be very tricky to diagnose, as discussed here, <a href='https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/living/diagnosing-psa-challenging' target='_blank'>https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/living/diagnosing-psa-challenging/</a> Secondly, communicating with those around us can be incredibly challenging, no matter what we're going through, but can be especially frustrating in situations like these. I'm so sorry to hear that your husband has passed this judgment onto you, and I found an article that discusses combatting emotions and experiences like these. You can find it here, <a href='https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/living/combatting-side-eyes' target='_blank'>https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/living/combatting-side-eyes/</a> Finally, you mentioned beginning Methotrexate this week. I'm sure this must be a scary time for you not knowing exactly how your body will react, but I found some additional background information on Methotrexate that you may find helpful, <a href='https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/medications/methotrexate-how-well-works-side-effects' target='_blank'>https://psoriatic-arthritis.com/medications/methotrexate-how-well-works-side-effects/</a> Again, I'm so sorry to hear about all you have had to endure over the past several years, and want you to know that we're here for you, and grateful to have you in our community. Thank you for sharing your story with us. Our community thrives because of members like you opening up about your PsA journey. Wishing you some relief soon, Casey (Psoriatic-Arthritis.com Team)
pattyj Member
I have been on methotrexate off and on since the early 1980's. Sometimes we have increased my dose more than I could tolerate and I had to give my liver a rest. But it was a miracle for me especially at first. It completely cleared my skin. I never understood for a very long time why I was so unmotivated to get things done and was so tired. People don't understand. My husband didn't either. As my kids became adults they didn't either. Research ideas of how to conserve your energy and work smarter. I often plan my work to minimize effort, like accumulating things at the top of the stairs and also at the bottom in a bag so I can make one trip each way instead of two. Take reasonable short cuts, explain your medical condition and ask for help when you need it, while still doing what you can. Eventually those around you will look to you for your direction for if you want help or not. Find some literature or some of these stories and share them with your husband so he can better understand. Have your doctor talk to him if needed. The stress of a spouse that is not a partner in what you are experiencing just makes the condition worse. I hope you are able to get through to him and truly get the emotional and physical support you need. Also keep after your doctor to get the treatment you need to be as comfortable and functional as possible.