Skip to Accessibility Tools Skip to Content Skip to Footer

When We Know Better, We Do Better

An age-old adage. One that has found its way into my daily life and has become a way of thinking and my personal mantra. The routine started with the following words: “do the best you can with what you have at the time.”

Let us just say that this was a mind-blowing moment for me. I am known for being pretty hard on myself. I tend to expect more from myself than I am capable of. I consistently take on too many things at the same time in an attempt to make everyone happy. This can be a good thing or a bad thing, in my opinion. It all depends if you can find a balance and keep things in moderation. As I was saying, when you know better you do better.

Wisdom 101: We are not what we once were

Let’s face it, things are just not what they used to be, we do not move as easily and we get tired sooner than we should. Household chores seem to have doubled in size and the demands of day to day life are simply too much. We berate ourselves for this, feeling that we should have gotten more done. Feeling somewhat annoyed that the task list just never seems never end. 

Preparing dinner and the frustration of opening a bottle that’s sealed up tight, begging to be opened find themselves broken and opened against the kitchen floor. Muttering quietly ane angrily under my breath: “Well now you are open aren’t you?” I quietly sweep up the mess and choose something else for dinner. It should be noted that I now get my jars pre-opened by someone before I even bring the shopping home.  

Lessons stem from frustration

I’d like to do better at harnessing and addressing my frustration. Either said than done. I do not think that I have ever in my life gotten as frustrated with tasks like I do now. Honestly, I think some of these tasks or activities that get me so wound up, I would not have been able to do even if I did not have psoriatic arthritis. Somehow that logic does not even come into the equation for me when frustration begins to build.

It truly is the little things that get to me on a daily basis. Dropping the house keys when unlocking the door or not being able to open my jar of pickles when the craving hits. Struggling to get up after I have been sitting a while and not being able to stand for as long as what I used to.

It’s being in pain all the time when trying to do small seemingly effortless things. Things that then turn out to be massive tasks requiring more effort than I care to give it.

Lessons learned living with psoriatic arthritis

So here I am, trying to do better every day with the knowledge I gain from my experiences. I’ve started packing things in easier to reach places. I’ve put more thought into my shopping list, heaven knows I am tired of cleaning up broken glass.

Equally important, I am learning to be kinder to myself and realizing what is within my limits and what is not. I am slowly berating myself less and attempting every day to be better and do better.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.


  • Leanne Donaldson
    2 weeks ago

    I love that, in theory if we know better then we do better. In practice, however, much like you, I find it so difficult to implement! We put a ridiculous amount of pressure on ourselves to pretend as if we were “normal.” I find myself going above and beyond to hide the more difficult parts of this life from my children then berating myself for not being “good enough” at it. Why do we do that to ourselves? We wouldn’t accept other people talking to us that way, so then why do we always do that to ourselves as PsA patients? But like you, I just try to keep going and doing better in the future than I did today. Sending you gentle hugs @clairg ! 🙂 -Leanne, fellow team member and wanna be perfectionist 🙂

  • Poll