Ending My Day on a Positive Note

What goes through your mind when you are trying to go to sleep? Are you tossing and turning thinking about your pain, the things you didn’t get done, or what you wished you could have done instead? This is exactly what my nights were like during the first dozen years of my chronic life.

Habitually negative

I was miserable during that period of my life. All I could see was doom and gloom. I’d not only go to bed angry, but I would also wake up in a foul mood. Listing my body’s failures and reminding myself about everything I wasn’t capable of became a habit, one that I needed to break. After a while, I forgot about what I could do which produced feelings of inadequacy, worthlessness, and failure.

Breaking the habit

I broke this habit almost six years ago and it has made a world of difference. Each night, instead of fixating on all that went wrong or that I wasn’t able to do, I focused on what was good about my day and what I did do. For example: I may have had to cut my day at Disneyland short, but instead dwelling on the time I missed in the park, I congratulate myself for the time I spent there. Maybe I didn’t have the energy to mop the kitchen floor one day, but I was able to spend an hour on the phone with a friend who was going through a tough time. There are days when I had to look hard for the positives, but I refused to go to bed until I could recognize at least one

The results

Instead of going to bed angry, I fell asleep smiling about what I did. I even began waking up with a smile. Over time listing the positives became easy and something I could recognize as they were happening. An added bonus has been that while I am thinking about my abilities, I often find ways to overcome some of my disabilities. Positive thinking won’t cure me, nor will it make my life perfect, but it will and has made it a life I enjoy.

When you go to bed tonight, ask yourself this: What did I DO today?

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