Surviving the Psoriatic Arthritis Storm Clouds
It’s not very often that I put something personal like this out for the world to read. For my articles, I usually like to share more positive things I’ve learned along my journey, recent research I’ve found interesting, or sometimes just plain old ranting and ravings of psoriatic arthritis lunacy.
But not today. Nope. Today I’m feeling a little more, shall we say, metaphorical.
The mental toll of psoriatic arthritis
This isn’t likely to be an article that you’ve found while Googling for information about psoriatic arthritis. It doesn’t include my usual tips or tricks about fighting fatigue or exploring different ways to manage pain.
I guess if I was forced to slap a label on it, it would probably fall under fluctuating mental health challenges stemming from psoriatic arthritis pain and fatigue. And yet what I’m slogging through right now feels like so much more than that simple string of words.
Fair warning
This article might not be for everyone. If you’ve never felt alone or if you’ve never had to fight your way out of the black mist of metaphorical storm clouds. Then this isn’t for you. That’s okay. There are plenty of articles on mental health with psoriatic arthritis out there. I’m sure you can find some good ones to help you.
However, if you have felt alone or like no one understands. Or if you know what it feels like to be surrounded by a fog so thick that you can’t see your hand in front of your face, then perhaps this article can validate some of those feelings. Perhaps you might even find it helpful to know that there is someone out there who understands. Someone who has been or even is, where you are.
Pushing through the storm clouds
Even as I write this to pay homage to my current mental health status, I’m not even sure if I’ll actually submit this or not. Because for me, it is still raw. The edges of the storm are still jagged and rough. The pain, still so real and current. Rather than being past the worst of the battle, I am still elbows deep in the midst of it. It is what could only be described as a vicious storm cloud.
What makes this PsA storm cloud so difficult is that it taints almost everything. Like a storm, it rolls across the landscape of my life, wrapping itself around everything it encounters. Otherwise happy moments with my family are touched with the skeletal fingers of pain and fatigue. What “should” be simple decisions, become clouded with swirls of doubt about my ability to carry out the plans I made with the best of intentions.
The warm rays of the sun
The storm rages and rolls on with every flare that comes my way. Some days I’m so deep in it that I think I will surely drown. But just as I’m ready to go under, to drown in the pain of my psoriatic arthritis storm, the clouds start to part and a hand reaches out to help and I hold on to the hope that I will find the warm rays of the sun again.
It always reminds me of some of the lyrics from The Beatles song, “Here Comes the Sun.”
“Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right
Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear
Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right”
Now that I’ve left you with those catchy lyrics in your head, and hopefully, a slight smile on your face, my job here is finished.
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